{"id":814,"date":"2012-02-02T16:37:28","date_gmt":"2012-02-02T16:37:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/?p=814"},"modified":"2012-02-04T09:56:21","modified_gmt":"2012-02-04T09:56:21","slug":"subjectification","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/?p=814","title":{"rendered":"Subjectification"},"content":{"rendered":"

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I\u2019d been in Fez two days<\/strong> when Uri, a gal from my hostel, unfolded a map on the breakfast table and invited me to join her tour group for the day. I balked.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t like formal tours\u2014the sight-seeing, tight schedules, and gift shops leave me feeling flat. Plus, I had my stereotypes: Uri was from Thailand and her friends were from Indonesia and Korea. In my experience, Asian tour groups spend a lot of time taking snaps. And they probably had jobs in tech and would want to talk computers.<\/p>\n

But by the time we finished our eggs and coffee, I was convinced. If we pooled our money, the tour would be cheap. Plus, the last couple days in the medina left me feeling like a walking wallet. Grouping up afforded protection from the aggressive street touts in the way that schooling protects fish from sharks. It\u2019d be easier to get around.<\/p>\n

 Our first stop was a museum<\/strong>. Uri and I walked down a freezing cold hallway lined with glass-encased heirlooms: an old sundial, some rusty earrings, tattered rugs. But both of us were more interested in the living than the dead inert objects of the past. We found our way outside again.<\/p>\n

We strolled between rows of mint and orange trees, and talked about Thailand. I was there last year. My recollections were largely culinary: the crunchy streetcart Tom Sum, the ubiquitous phad Thai, the milky-sweet iced-teas that were my afternoon ritual. And, of course, it\u2019s impossible to not remember the prostitution–the absurd upside-down universe where old-pot-bellied \u201cSexpats\u201d strolled the streets with young tottering Thai women.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s the deal?<\/em> I asked her. Is this really just \u201cpart of the culture\u201d as I\u2019d always heard (often from the Sex-pats themselves)<\/p>\n

She flinched. Started to speak and stopped. A flash of adrenaline stuck her for words. The issue seemed close to the surface, and I felt bad for bringing it up.<\/p>\n

\u201dThis is just the tiniest portion of the population,\u201d she seethed, \u201cbut everyone thinks that all Thai women are easy sex.\u201d Once, a guy sitting next to her at a conference turned to her and declared they would be having sex. And she is wary of English teachers in Thailand, unsure if they are viewing her in sexual terms.<\/p>\n

There are many versions of Thailand, but in her version, prostitution is frowned upon and getting together with a foreign guy is questioned. But she added a caveat: sometimes real love blooms, and isn\u2019t given proper credibility. A friend of hers is in a legitimate relationship with an American and struggles with the disrespectful assumptions people make about their relationship. Everyone is sure she is just after his money.<\/p>\n

\u201cIs this really what outsiders think of us–that we are just sex?\u201d  she asked.<\/p>\n

I had to admit that sometimes it seemed that way. Not a week went by on Facebook without someone announcing they were going to Thailand followed by a chorus of comments: \u201cDon\u2019t forget the condoms!\u201d or \u201cHave fun. Wink-wink.\u201d And, even my own travels there left a strong impression: I\u2019ll never forget the Twilight Zone that was Pattaya: an entire boardwalk lined with girls and old men\u2014some even shuffling walkers\u2014trolling for evening company. Admittedly, this was a huge tourist area.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut people think of a lot of other things too,\u201d I countered.  \u201cGreat beaches, kind people, gilded temples.\u201d<\/p>\n

After the museum<\/strong>, our group moved on to a caf\u00e9. As we sipped our mint tea, our discussion of stereotypes broadened to include the rest of our group: two were Muslims from Indonesia, and the other from South Korea. I mentioned that I’d just finished reading Ayann Hiri Ali\u2019s book, Nomad, which although reflective of Ali’s own experience, seemed to fan many of the West\u2019s greatest fears about Muslims: the oppression of women, forced marriages, genital mutilation, extremism.<\/p>\n

Bowo shook is head. These stereotypes did not fit the Muslims he knew in Indonesia.<\/p>\n

Noka was also Indonesian and had studied in The States\u2014in a small Pennsylvania town. He said that sometimes people asked him if he had a television. Or, worse, if he lived in trees. One person asked if he drove to the U.S. from Indonesia.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat is the stereotype of Americans?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cIgnorant,\u201d he said.  We all laughed. Though the stories about American naivet\u00e9 often seemed exaggerated, it might have been the truest stereotype at all.<\/p>\n

Afterall, I just had to consider the stereotypes I\u2019d started the morning with: that we would spend the dull day posing for photos and talking about computer programming. Instead, we experienced what travel does best, which is rattle the rust off our world view that accumulates when we stay in one place for too long. That morning we\u2019d left the hotel as a Thai Prostitute, a Suicide Bomber, a Primitive, a Techie, and a Moneyed Ignoramus, and returned as real people with real names: Uri, Noka, Bowo, Hyo and Christina.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I\u2019d been in Fez two days when Uri, a gal from my hostel, unfolded a map on the breakfast table and invited me to join her tour group for the day. I balked. I don\u2019t like formal tours\u2014the sight-seeing, tight … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-814","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/814","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=814"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/814\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":829,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/814\/revisions\/829"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=814"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=814"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vanabonds.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=814"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}